The list of "I wants" can go on and on. For kids it's, "I want that video game." "I want that scooter." For us, it's, "I want that car." "I want that couch." No matter what we have, there's always more. Henry David Thoreau said, "We make ourselves rich by making our wants few." Most of us already have what we need… it's just a matter of controlling what we want. So, the next time someone in your family wants to...
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Soon after my wife and I were married, we made a discovery. It seemed like when we argued, it was at night… when we were tired and irritable from a long day. So we set a curfew on serious discussions: nine o'clock is the limit. Now, when we start to get into a heavy talk after nine, we remind each other that it's late, we're not going to resolve anything tonight, and we can talk about it tomorrow. The next...
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Most of the time, married couples should be in agreement. Especially when it comes to big things like your relationship, your family, your beliefs. But when a minor issue has the potential to become a major problem, then it's better to keep the peace than to be right. For example, if my wife and I are buying a couch and she picks one that I don't really like, I can dig my heels in and fight, or we can try to...
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From athletes on steroids to physically abusive rap stars, red-handed corporate executives to red-faced politicians, we have heard apologies galore lately. But does simply saying, "I'm sorry" to your child mean you've taken responsibility for your mistakes? No. Sometimes it just means you're sorry you got caught. There's more to saying sorry to your child than that. A true apology comes with acknowledging what...
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These questions might help you determine the answer. Do you drink alone when you feel angry or sad? Does your drinking ever make you late for work? Do you ever drink after telling yourself you won't? Do you ever forget what you did while drinking? Has anyone in your family expressed concern about your drinking? If so, don't brush it off… really listen to what they have to say… and get help. Talk to your spouse,...
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I'm not talking about the turkey and dressing sitting in your fridge—left over from Thanksgiving. I'm talking about your time. You do the math. Right now, think about all of the things that go into your day . . . rushing to get ready in the morning, going to work, cleaning the house, cooking dinner, chores in the evening, watching TV. Now, add up how much time you really spend interacting with your kids. What's...
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OK…you're at a ball field and you notice a mom and daughter arriving for a game. For 10 minutes, Mom talks enthusiastically. She laughs, she jokes … but it's not with her daughter…it's with her friend…on the phone! Mom never makes eye contact with her daughter, never talks with her or encourages her before the big game. Sound familiar? If so, take advantage of the time that you have with your kids. You never...
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