Last night, as I stood at the kitchen sink, my son tried to push me aside, without saying a word. Well, rather than just correct him, my wife and I decided to employ a little role-play. As I stood at the sink again, she played the role of my son and said, "Dad, will you please excuse me? I'd like to wash my hands." I said, "Sure, come on in." and then moved out of the way. You see, telling our kids how to do...
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We're conditioned to react negatively to the word "no." We don't like to hear it… and we don't like to say it. We thrive on saying "Yes" to ourselves—to our own wants and desires—to a new car, the latest gadget, an expensive vacation. So why are we surprised when our kids expect instant gratification. If we can't say "No" to ourselves, how will they learn to say "No" to themselves and realize the rewards of...
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After a couple announces the engagement, everyone shifts into preparation mode. A lot of time is spent on guest lists, the ceremony, and the honeymoon. It's easy to get so caught up in thinking about the wedding day preparations that sometimes couples forget about preparation for a lifetime of marriage. So take time to really get to know each other, ask hard questions and go to pre-marital counseling before you...
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A lot of parents have a hard time telling the difference. And that's a problem. You've seen it…a mom dressed like her teenage daughter. A dad who offers his teenage son a beer while they watch the game. When mom or dad becomes a buddy, the child loses out on the most important relationship…that of parent and child. Your kids have plenty of friends, what they need from you is guidance, love and boundaries. They...
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From athletes on steroids to physically abusive rap stars, red-handed corporate executives to red-faced politicians, we have heard apologies galore lately. But does simply saying, "I'm sorry" to your child mean you've taken responsibility for your mistakes? No. Sometimes it just means you're sorry you got caught. There's more to saying sorry to your child than that. A true apology comes with acknowledging what...
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OK…you're at a ball field and you notice a mom and daughter arriving for a game. For 10 minutes, Mom talks enthusiastically. She laughs, she jokes … but it's not with her daughter…it's with her friend…on the phone! Mom never makes eye contact with her daughter, never talks with her or encourages her before the big game. Sound familiar? If so, take advantage of the time that you have with your kids. You never...
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Your email has a feature that sends out a quick response to whoever's trying to contact you. That's fine for emails, but many of us carry that auto-reply mode into our daily conversations. Your kids ask you to play with them after work. Your auto reply is, "Not right now." Your spouse asks you to help with something around the house, without missing a beat, you reply, "I'm busy now. I'll do it later." Well,...
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