Most of us have one or two things we’d rather not share with the outside world, but some people are slaves to their secrets. Extramarital affairs; drug, alcohol and pornography addictions; spouse or child abuse – all are secrets that can consume and destroy lives, marriages, families and jobs. If you live in that bondage, or you’re hiding something from your spouse, children or friends, it’s time to come clean....
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"How was your day?" "Fine." "What did you do at school today?" "Nothing." Sound familiar? We expect them to share their thoughts and feelings on our schedule, but it doesn't happen that way. We have to be patient and we have to be available when they are ready to open up. You never know when it is coming. When it does, you'd better stop whatever you're doing and listen, because the opportunity may not come...
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From athletes on steroids to physically abusive rap stars, red-handed corporate executives to red-faced politicians, we have heard apologies galore lately. But does simply saying, "I'm sorry" to your child mean you've taken responsibility for your mistakes? No. Sometimes it just means you're sorry you got caught. There's more to saying sorry to your child than that. A true apology comes with acknowledging what...
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Sunday is Parent's Day…a day established by Congress for the purpose of "recognizing, uplifting, and supporting the role of parents in bringing up their children." If you've had a good relationship with your mom and dad, use this day as an opportunity to thank them for one important thing they did to impact your life in a positive way. If your relationship with them has been more difficult, use it as an...
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OK…you're at a ball field and you notice a mom and daughter arriving for a game. For 10 minutes, Mom talks enthusiastically. She laughs, she jokes … but it's not with her daughter…it's with her friend…on the phone! Mom never makes eye contact with her daughter, never talks with her or encourages her before the big game. Sound familiar? If so, take advantage of the time that you have with your kids. You never...
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Your email has a feature that sends out a quick response to whoever's trying to contact you. That's fine for emails, but many of us carry that auto-reply mode into our daily conversations. Your kids ask you to play with them after work. Your auto reply is, "Not right now." Your spouse asks you to help with something around the house, without missing a beat, you reply, "I'm busy now. I'll do it later." Well,...
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First, focus on the other person…open your posture, look them in the eyes, give them encouraging nods and acknowledging words. Second, summarize what they are saying. You might say something like, "So, what I hear you saying is such and such." Third, ask open-ended questions. Not questions that solicit just a yes or no answer. And don't use the word "why"... "why can't you…" "why didn't you…" "why aren't...
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