Well, for a flame to exist, you have to have fuel.  You know those old pictures you have tucked away… the love letters you’ve saved… the texts you exchange… the seemingly harmless flirtations on Facebook.  These are the fuel that—given a spark—might just become a raging inferno.  So, the first step to extinguish an old flame is to get rid of the fuel source.  Throw out the reminders, get rid of the pictures of...

When married couples are exposed to the heavy, pounding winds of life—sickness, losing a job, affairs, addictions—weaknesses in their relationship are exposed.  But struggles don’t always have to rip apart a marriage.  Here are 7 steps to survive a marriage crisis.  First, take turns being strong.  In the midst of a crisis, emotions are sure to run high.  Finding a way to tag-team allows one of you to be weak,...

Susan recently shared how she felt some bitterness in our marriage.  She explained how I sometimes tell her to stop using unkind words toward me, and then I turn around and do the same thing a few minutes later. She gets frustrated.  And that frustration, when not dealt with, leads to unresolved anger and then bitterness.  I asked for forgiveness and worked to change my errant ways. Here are 4 things a spouse can...

In his book, Uncommon Marriage, Tony Dungy shares why couples often fight harder for their own pride than for the good of their marriage.  He says “it goes against our human nature” to apologize when we think we’re right and our spouse is wrong.  It may not be easy to take the high road, but here are 3 steps to fight for your marriage rather than your pride.  First, identify what the conflict is really about. ...

Here are 3 ways to help your marriage feel less stressed. First, help more with the kids.  If you’re the kind who constantly delegates parenting responsibilities to your spouse, step up your game…whether that means helping your son with his science project, washing your daughter’s uniform before soccer practice tomorrow, or attending a parent/teacher conference.  Second, be your spouse’s teammate in parenting....

For some, calling it quits means living in the same home, but giving up on any hope of a healthy marriage.  For others, calling it quits means separation or, even divorce.  Before traveling down one of those roads, I’d like to remind you of 3 vital things.  First, remember your vows.  The day you and your spouse got married, you promised “to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or worse...”...

I’ve been hearing that question more and more lately.  People who’ve had affairs often say that they had some unfulfilled need that slowly began to be met by someone other than their spouse—a friend, co-worker, old flame, a neighbor.  From there, it was a slippery slope to a full-blown extramarital affair and a broken marriage.  So what can you do? Well, be aware of danger signs and take action.  The best way to...