There’s no excuse for having an affair. And sure, sometimes they happen out of the blue but, more often than not, affairs don’t just happen. Usually there are things that are said or not said, done or not done, over the years that are contributing factors.  Here are some ways to push your spouse toward an affair.  First, constantly, compare and criticize.  Hurt and tear down your spouse with critical or comparing...

We all know what it’s like to have someone sitting right next to us, but whose mind is miles and miles away.  In marriage, this can play out when our spouse is physically beside us, but is emotionally distant.  To reconnect, here are 3 steps to take when your spouse is close, but distant.  First, recognize it.  Avoid being so focused on your own issues and “to-do” list that you’re unable to see when your spouse is...

There are some things we need to survive physically—air, food, water. There are some things we need to survive emotionally in marriage—things like love, trust, truth and understanding. When a marriage is deprived of such things, it can slowly start to die. Here are 3 ways to revive a dying marriage.  First, stop suffocating your marriage.  Your words are powerful—the words you say out loud to your spouse and the...

In marriage, there are two people and two sides to every story.  When it comes to affairs, both spouses can often point to things that led to the infidelity.  The person having the affair cannot justify it…it’s never a good thing…but there may be some things that pushed them in that direction.  Here are some ways to push your spouse toward an affair.  First, don’t really listen.  Be sure to glance down at your...

Before you pack your bags and call it quits, here are some questions to ask. First, ask, “Have we done everything we can to rehabilitate our marriage?” It’s important to fight hard for your marriage—whether it’s by seeking counseling, slaying addictions or reprioritizing your life. Second, ask, “Is there unresolved conflict?” Instead of covering up your hurts, try sharing and working through those feelings...

Before you take the first step down that painful path, here are 3 truths to consider.  First, remember your vows.  You promised to have and to hold your spouse from this day forward for better or for worse.  This commitment was meant to be for a lifetime.  Second, remember what marriage is.  It’s not a conditional contract, but an unconditional covenant of love.  The difference?  A contract is all about what you...

The best time for marriage counseling is before you need it.  Marriage counseling teaches couples how to work through their differences, communicate better, and solve problems in the relationship.  So why don’t more people do it?  Well, many couples feel that their private life should be just that—private.  They feel there is a stigma associated with seeking counseling.  But there are times when a third party...