First, focus on the other person…open your posture, look them in the eyes, give them encouraging nods and acknowledging words. Second, summarize what they are saying. You might say something like, "So, what I hear you saying is such and such." Third, ask open-ended questions. Not questions that solicit just a yes or no answer. And don't use the word "why"... "why can't you…" "why didn't you…" "why aren't...
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During the Civil War more than half of the skirmishes took place in Virginia, and each battle was just a continuation of the previous fight. Same reasons… same territory…different days. Sometimes marriage is like that. You have the same fights over and over about the kids, the money, the romance. The list goes on and on. But rather than continuing to take up arms, join hands and draft a resolution. Each of you...
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From athletes on steroids to physically abusive rap stars, red-handed corporate executives to red-faced politicians, we have heard apologies galore lately. But does simply saying, "I'm sorry" to your child mean you've taken responsibility for your mistakes? No. Sometimes it just means you're sorry you got caught. There's more to saying sorry to your child than that. A true apology comes with acknowledging what...
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OK…you're at a ball field and you notice a mom and daughter arriving for a game. For 10 minutes, Mom talks enthusiastically. She laughs, she jokes … but it's not with her daughter…it's with her friend…on the phone! Mom never makes eye contact with her daughter, never talks with her or encourages her before the big game. Sound familiar? If so, take advantage of the time that you have with your kids. You never...
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Your email has a feature that sends out a quick response to whoever's trying to contact you. That's fine for emails, but many of us carry that auto-reply mode into our daily conversations. Your kids ask you to play with them after work. Your auto reply is, "Not right now." Your spouse asks you to help with something around the house, without missing a beat, you reply, "I'm busy now. I'll do it later." Well,...
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Well, maybe you're not saying what he wants to hear. What your husband craves are words of praise and validation from the most important person in his life. There are 10 things your husband wants to hear from you. Number one… "I love being your wife." Number two… "You're an outstanding father." Three… "I'm really attracted to you. You are the Man!" Four… "I really respect the decision you made." Join me...
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By the time boys are 4 to 6 years old, they often feel the need for a masculine role model. And that need doesn't change as boys grow older. If your son's father is not in the picture, another adult male you trust needs to be involved in his life. You might find a man to mentor your son through a mentoring program. Or, you might have some male relatives, friends, or neighbors who would be good role models for...
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