As a private pilot, I can tell you that bad weather and air turbulence are just a part of flying. Sometimes it can be avoided…other times, it can’t. Building an intimate marriage is kind of like flying a plane – sure, most of us would like to avoid turbulence in our marriage, but sometimes you just have to fly through it. The key to navigating through it is to learn to resolve conflict and communicate with each...

I'm not talking about the kind of affair that includes physical infidelity. There's a more subtle form of unfaithfulness that is damaging to a marriage as well. Emotional affairs begin when a married person begins confiding in someone other than their spouse. Maybe it's a husband, talking with a female coworker, sharing some struggle he's having at home. Maybe it's a wife who runs into an old boyfriend and...

Business author Jim Collins says, "How you do when the storm comes depends on what you did before the storm comes." In the same way, how you and your spouse weather difficult times in your marriage depends on how well you prepared beforehand. So, how do you get ready for those dark, cloudy days? First, you and your spouse must decide together that you're committed to each other for life—for better or worse, no...

If you have, make up your mind that you will never use it again. The "D" word is divorce. It can come up when you're fighting, "I'm sick of you – I want a divorce!" Or when things aren't perfect, "If you do that again, I'm outta here!" Well, you need to replace a divorce mindset with a commitment mindset. You see, if divorce is even an option, you're more likely to consider it. And the threat of it keeps couples...

Yesterday, I talked about knowing when you need counseling. Today I'd like to talk about how to choose a marriage counselor. After finally deciding to get help, many couples are overwhelmed with the sheer numbers of counseling options. Most couples begin by searching the internet. Another good choice is to ask a family doctor or trusted minister for suggestions. But the best referrals for marriage counselors come...

You feel like it's flat lined. There's no pulse—not a breath of life remains. Before you pronounce it dead on arrival, there are four basic tools you can use to resurrect that dying relationship. First, patience. It took time for your relationship to need resuscitation; it will take time for it to get well again. Second, determination. Choose to be committed to each other for life, no matter what, and work...

Some people wouldn't say much, but some would say degrading things about their spouse. Sure, affairs do happen when things are going well in a marriage. But sometimes, there have been years of neglect and loneliness…years of two people failing to give and love. As my wife and I often say to each other, there are always two sides to every story. And just as it may take two to pull the relationship apart, it takes...