In the wild, prodding a porcupine with a stick or by yelling doesn’t work very well…it just makes the porcupine more angry. You risk being on the receiving end of some sharp, painful quills. It’s the same way in our relationships. If you prod a porcupine spouse, teen, or in-law, with your words, things usually don’t go to well. Saying things like “What’s your problem?” just makes them even more mad. There are...
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I can tell you firsthand that there are two things husbands really want: respect and adoration. So if you want to love your husband well, then adore him well. Here are some ways to help you get started. First, adore him as he is. Don’t wait until he’s nicer, more patient, or making more money. It’s important to lay a foundation and adore him right now for who he is. Second, adore him for what he...
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The question is not whether your teen will make a bone-headed or maybe even rebellious decision. The question is how you, the parent, will react. Here are some ways that will guarantee your teen learns absolutely nothing from a bad decision. First, protect them from all painful, uncomfortable, expensive or embarrassing consequences. This will ensure that they will do it again. They’ll think they can do pretty much...
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As parents, we want to do everything we can do for our kids, but that’s not always best. It’s important to teach our kids to do things for themselves. So here are some ways to teach your children self-discipline. First, teach structured routine. Organized and consistent structure breeds discipline. For example, by setting a designated time for homework to be completed each day, the routine will become a natural...
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Mark Twain once said that “The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.” Well, the bad news over the years about the institution of marriage has been exaggerated as well. In her book, The Good News About Marriage, best-selling author Shaunti Feldhahn presents groundbreaking research that reveals the shocking and incredibly inspiring truth. Her research shows first that the actual divorce rate has never...
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When our expectations for our wives become unreasonable, we are really setting our marriages up to falter and perhaps even fail. Here are some unfair expectations husbands should avoid. First, that she always needs you to fix it. Just because Susan tells me about a challenge doesn’t mean she wants me to fix it. She usually knows how to fix something and just wants me to listen to her. Second, you should not just...
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We all want our marriages to get even better. But improvement only comes when we are intentional with our words and actions with our spouse. To become more intentional, here’s a simple checklist of things to do for your wife each year. First, take a trip alone with her. Spending time together away from the world is the perfect way to reconnect. Second, make a big deal about her birthday. Instead of just...
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