8 Ways to Raise Confident Kids

Confidence is a learned trait and must be nurtured.  It can be very fragile at times.  Some of the greatest achievers on the planet go through bouts struggling with confidence.  That is not such a bad thing.  It usually leads to even greater achievements.  Nonetheless, the overall goal is for our kids to feel secure about who they were created to be.  The following thoughts will help you raise confident kids:

1. Listen.  A simple task it would seem.  Amazing how difficult it can be to just simply listen.  Not solve, not direct, and not lecture.  Listen.  All children will tell you what is on their mind.  They only want someone to hear them.  Give your child the patience and time they need from you.  It will do a world of good.

2. Pep Squad.  We all need a cheering section.  A fan of who we are and what we do.  Do that for your kids.  Encouragement is vital in the growth of children.  Go to their games, their recitals, and their plays.  Attend teachers meetings and have lunch with your kids at school.  Let them know how proud you are of their effort.   And, don’t forget to schedule one-on-one time too.

3. The Big Picture.  Some children have outward abilities that are obvious and easy to recognize.  Your son might be an outstanding soccer player for instance.  However, that is not all there is to him.  Maybe he’s very kind and considerate.  Help your children find their own gifts, talents, and personality traits.  See the entire picture of what and who your child is and then acknowledge it.

4. Security Breeds Confidence.  Children desperately need to feel secure.  Home should be a loving and safe place.  It’s your job to make it so.  That seems like common sense, but so many children lack this security in their life.  Parents fighting.  Destructive habits.  Drug abuse.  A great many things can ruin the security of your child’s emotions and thus their confidence.  Stay alert and stay on duty.

5. Greater Purpose.  There is a major difference between confidence and self-centeredness.  Arrogance can also enter the picture.  You do not want to raise little monsters to unleash on the world.  There are enough of those as it is.  We have a greater purpose in life by God’s design.  We should be humble yet strong.  Confident yet gracious.  Intelligent yet compassionate.  Teach them to see beyond their own desires and needs.

6. Catch Them When They Fall.  Life isn’t always sunshine and lollipops.  Downpours and hard times are always sure to come.  They are moments that test our character and define us as human beings.  When disappointment or sadness come knocking for your child, be there to help them understand.  Not necessarily to solve, but for support.  They need those times like flowers need rain.  Teach them the perspective needed to absorb these times and move forward.

7. The Power of Positive Thinking.  “Just what makes that little ole ant think he’ll move that rubber tree plant?”  He had high hopes, so the song goes.  When our minds are focused and our spirits high, we can accomplish miracles.  Positive thinking moves mountains as well as rubber tree plants.  Just be sure to temper it with reality.  You don’t want to set your child up for failure or heartbreak.  But, allow your child to dream big and to never give up.

8. The Right Crowd.  You are not always with your child.  So, obviously, other people have a great deal of influence on them.  Who these other people are matters very much.  Get to know the important friends in your child’s life.  Get to know their parents.  A circle of friends should be diverse and inspiring.  Friends that push us to be better and help lift us up to greater heights. 

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